This morning has been super! I love getting up earlier and this morning was the first time in a while I've gotten up before 7:00! (I am NOT NOT NOT a morning person *grin*) I had a great time doing a day in my Bible study and really getting to meditate and spend time thinking about it instead of just "doing" it if you know what I mean! :) I feel like the Lord is trying to teach me some huge things after my Bible study group met last night. I wrote these verse down and have been thinking on them a lot already today and reminding myself of them. The day I did in my study today was on Col. 3. It is so different reading in the Amplified Bible! I love it! I gained so much more than all the other millions of times I have read these verses. The Amplified is wonderful because it takes words and basically gives the Hebrew/Greek definitions in the verse sort of so you don't have to go look them up! It gives you a whole new look on verses!

To shorten out what could turn into a lot of writing I have felt like I have been a pit for the past few months. Just some different situations with working at church and having rough feelings that have led me to believing lies from Satan that I entertain without even really realizing it and then seeing where I am at and going, how in the world did I get here Lord!!!!

"And Whatsoever you do no matter what it is in word or need, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, and in dependence upon His Person, giving praise to God the Father through Him." Col. 3:17

I was just thinking from this verse that I am actually doing everything in my life in the name of the Lord since I am His child. So what testimony am I giving and what kind of reputation am I giving the Lord AS I work throughout my days!? This verse is saying I am to put my complete and total dependence upon the Lord. Upon His very Person and then to top it off I am supposed to be praising His name for everything and during everything I do! Yikes! Then I read these verses and I felt myself flooded with relief, with peace, with encouragement! God does all the work! All I have to do is be diligent to seek Him everyday and He does the rest!!!

"Come to me all who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest! I will ease and relieve and refresh you souls!!!! Take MY yoke upon you and learn of Me for I am gentle, meek and humble lowly in heart, and you will find rest, relief, ease, refreshment, recreation and blessed quiet for your souls! For my yoke is wholesome, useful and good; not harsh, hard, sharp or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant, and My burden is light and easy to be borne!!!" Matt 11:28-30

WOW! WOW! WOW! I SO needed that! :) So, I am off to a fresh and resting start today! I'm praying I stay strong and do not choose to take off His yoke without really realizing that is what I am doing! I don't know! Seems like it all makes sense about these pits that Pastor Wells was talking about last Sunday in his sermon! Okay, for example, when something happens as a misunderstanding or maybe even comes across wrong in Sam and I's relationship I am the kind of person that just.....shuts down I guess you can say. I tend to say, Oh it is okay, never mind, forget it it isn't a big deal just because I do not like conflict. Who does. I like peace and smoothness. Who doesn't! :) What I am not realizing is that every time I do that I am giving Satan a foothold in my life, a brick is laid between us. If that keeps up for a while I have let Satan have so many footholds in my life that he has a huge part of me and there is so many bricks between Sam and I that a wall has been built in our relationship between myelf and the person I love the most in my life!!! Then down I go into a pit believing the lies of Satan. Lies like, "You aren't really loved. You aren't very important as you think sometimes. You can never do this or that. You need to become this person or change this in order to get anywhere. Etc." BIG pit hole! So it all makes sense! Reminds me of those verse in Ephesians 4:26-27; "When angry, hurt or frustrated do not sin. Do not ever let you wrath ,your exasperation, your fury or indignation last until the sun goes down! Leave no such room or foothold for the devil, and give no opportunity to him!"

I feel like Satan is being slowly banished as I am slowly and very immaturely :) figuring all this out and making sense of what I have been feeling like for the past month! God is an amazing God! All I got to say is if He was like us humans we would be in trouble! We're horrible creatures in our sinful nature! Horrible! :) Thank you Lord! I have so much to learn in life! I know I will ALWAYS be learning new things in my walk with God! I will ALWAYS being climbing a ladder until the day I die! Then and ONLY then will I have reached the last step!!!!

"Always walk through life backwards so that you can see what God has done in your life in the past and know that He'll always be there in the future!"

Today we have topped the hill to half way to our wedding day! HALF WAY! Come on now, that is a big deal here! *laugh* The Lord has given a lot of patience, grace and love!

.....Sam arrives from half way around the world (that's the way we see it) to be in OK for the weekend and I finally get to see him again face to face! I know to some of you you may think me so pathetic. "Three weeks," you're thinking, "come on Leslie!" Well, you try it! :) You try being in love and knowing the one that God has chosen for you to be your other half, your wedding is still 61/2 months (193 days) away, you rarely see each other and your life consists of phone conversations, which by the way is very old at this point! I'm not complaining, don't get me wrong, it is just....well......very hard sometimes! If it weren't for the Lord I think I would be dead long ago! *laughing*

We had a wonderful weekend! Lots of fun and lots of face to face conversation! I did tell Sam not long ago that once we were married.....I was turning my phone off and not talking to him on it unless it was an absolute emergency! :D Friday night we were able to go to the Reaching Should International banquet at the Cowboy Hall of Fame. He was able to get off work early, thanks to his wonderful boss and fellow co-workers *grin*, and get to OK earlier than normal for that!

Sat was a lot of fun especially getting to go eat with Brandon and Michelle! They are awesome people and it was wonderful to talk to them and hear about all God is doing in their life and from the sound of it He is really at work! I can't wait to get to know Michelle more! She is so sweet! She works at a cookie/pastry shop and she made Sam and I some cookies. It is kinda hard to eat them though because they are so cute and well done!!! Sam and I were talking and wishing they were going to be in Texas after we were married so we could keep up the fellowship!

Michelle's creative cookies! They are REALLY good once we ate one! She made us "destroy" one at the restaurant to see how it tasted!! LOL :D

Something else we did on Sat was we went back to the Myriad Gardens to the place where Sam had proposed to me! it was fun because we thought back on it and reenacted it to some extent just remembering the day, the feelings and thoughts, the perfect day and surroundings we had had that February 14th! :) We even got some snap shots. It is really hard to take pictures of yourself all the time! :) lol We were even trying to put my camera in a tree and set the timer! It was hilarious now that I think back! People probably thought we were coo coo but I guess when you're in love you really don't care! *grin*

It is really hard to take pictures of yourselves I am telling you! trust me! When you have a camera like I do and you try to do that you are gonna get some like the one above for sure....oh man I look like a dork! It was pretty funny!



The weekend went very fast but the Lord is giving us a reward for our long wait as I see it! We only have to wait 4 days, which doesn't seem like a THING now, and then we'll see each other again! This Friday is Sam's Friday of the month off and then next Monday is Labor Day so of course he is off! So Thursday evening he will be up again!!!! Yea I know! EXCITING! My family is going to the lake for the weekend and Sam gets to go with us! Oh yea! He is going to learn to ski, whether he thinks he is or not he is! :P It is going to be a blast! I will be sure and post a big one on it! :)

So, wonderful Sam, is back in Texas living his "second" life there at home! :) He says that is how it feels anyway. Living two lives and I think it is just because I have his heart and he has to try to live down there without it until March 8th! *laughing* Love you Honey! I am praying so hard for you and I will see you in about 3 days now! :D

This was me Saturday morning... before I left for West Tawakoni, I did my good deed and cleaned our bathroom. I know it looks grouse but I can't keep all of my leg hairs so sometimes they get stuck in the drain! (I think I am loosing my head hair too!) LOL I hope you don't get groused out! (This was not one of the pictures Leslie was thinking of!) I love you Honey!

My nephew Jimmy took this one... I was smiling real BIG for this one! (That is Laura in the back ground)

This pictures is really cool!!! This is Will!!! Yea I know he is pretty cute... and handsome... but he not only has the looks he can hit the bullseye with darts!!! Him and I were playing and he threw that right up there and thud!! Right dab in the middle of the bullseye!!! I couldn't believe it so I ran and got my camera and told him to stand next to it!!

One last picture! This is of last night... long distance relationships require a bit... more creativity... lets just say and me, being a guy... who sits in front of a computer all day and is basically a geek. :) I need some help with color matching! So I took a bunch of pictures of myself and sent them to my girl cause she is like really good you know with looking really cute (or cool!) and in style!! I really can't wait to be married!! I won't have to worry about getting to the office and looking down at my pants and realizing that these were the pair I spilt milk on last week and I forgot to wash them!!!! Its crazy being me and I am afraid there is a lot of evidence of me needing LESLIE!!!

Hope you all enjoyed! The last six months have been a huge learning experience! I am still learning... and from what I hear I will never stop learning but that cool thing about that is I will never stop falling more in love with Leslie LaRae! God has taught me through her so many things about life! I cannot not wait to take her as my wife! Only 199 more days!

I love you Leslie LaRae! You are and will be my ONE and ONLY!

Today is 200 days exactly to the day that Sam and I will be married! 200 days to March 8th!

Today marks the day Sam and I have been engaged for half a year! Already I know! Long time! Seems nearly impossible to me! Unbelievably unrealistic! Seems like only yesterday he asked me to marry him and I said yes! No one can tell me that engagement goes extremely slow! In the overall picture it goes just as fast as the rest of your life buzzing right on by you! Sam has been making me smile already this morning with his e-mails and notes! He is so amazing! One thing for sure there is NO other man like Samuel Wesley Shepherd and no one in the world will ever make me think otherwise no matter what!! :)

I love you Honey, and wish very badly I could be with you today! God has blessed me too much! I do not deserve you or your love! I admire you with all my heart and am honored you would ask me to be your wife! I look forward to anticipation that day I can truly be yours and spend the rest of my days loving you, serving you and just spending time with you!!!